Welcome back. Let’s move on to better things.

John Sebastian (Lovin’ Spoonful), Welcome Back:

… Welcome back.

We always could spot a friend.

Welcome back.

And I smile when I think how you must have been,

and I know what a scene you were learning in.

Was there something that made you come back again?

And what could ever lead ya,

back here where we need ya?…

Let’s take care of the dirty laundry right up front, shall we?

A few weeks ago, this blog quietly had its fifth year anniversary. That being said, I’m not quite sure this past year should be included in that total. For a wide variety of reasons and excuses, nothing was posted here for the whole of 2011.

One of the most frustrating things for me was that I lost all the older posts during a platform switch. At first I had a copy of the database, and had even pledged to spend an hour or so each day rebuilding (at least the posts, since the comments were gone forever). A few months into 2011 a hard drive failure meant the loss of that file and I believed that would be that. The archive, I thought, couldn’t be rebuilt without a copy of the original content.

So, I spent time on other things and ignored the problem instead of looking for a solution. Actually… I’ve done that in a lot of different areas over the past year, and I’m pretty well disgusted with myself for it.

My departure from The Iowa Independent in November was disappointing and shocking — although, in retrospect, it shouldn’t have been. As a member of the founding team in 2007 and as someone who had watched devastating November winds of change year after year, I should have had a better grasp of reality and not been as willing to look the other way — to pretend that certain things were not the precursors they were.

Don’t get me wrong — I loved The Iowa Independent; gave way too much of myself to The Iowa Independent; and often felt that I was The Iowa Independent. I don’t regret the time I spent, the friendships that were forged or the work that I did. What I do regret is misplaced trust, my own naivete and loss of my own voice and space.

The good news is that the Internet is an amazing thing and I’ve been able to find an archive of past posts. In between other projects, I’ve been rebuilding Essential Estrogen post-by-post. It isn’t a speedy or efficient process, but it has been cathartic. Through the window of those archives I’ve been able to view my own growth as a writer, reporter and person.

Much more than I want to contemplate remains to be done and, although I had originally thought I wouldn’t begin anew until the task was complete, I’m ready now. I hope you’re still willing to come along — there are better things ahead.

… The past is gone. It’s all been said. So here’s to what the future brings…